Kroger has a sale on economy packs of some ridic brand of condom with a smiley devil heart on it $4.99 for 24
Sounds like a baby waitign to happen
I think I just was a dick to Paul Rudd.
Did you know the Dallas Cowboy cheerleaders have an exercise show ON Demand? Yeah, I had a lonely night
you are the sluttiest virgin ive ever met
thanks it was an honor just to be nominated
once I found out that a naked stripper wasn't gonna pop out of the cake I kind of just lost interest in the party
best line ever after sex today..."wow, that was a porn-star sized load"
But it's a terrible idea. One erection and it's gonna go wrong
HOLY SHIT HE'S TRYING TO EAT HIS FOOT. THIS IS THE BEST DAY OF MY LIFE.
You have permanently scared my back with your nails. I would like to congratulate you on a job well done.
I dunno... But she calls vodka "dancing juice"
yo knit me an eyepatch. but also make it usable as a thong
I kind of really want to call off the engagement but I kind of need his mom's mashed potatoes on thanksgiving so I'm between a rock & a hard place here
Hooked up with another cop last night. Think I am renaming my vagina "dispatch"
Is it good porn? Or is it more of that fucked up Cabbage Patch Doll porn you made us watch
I apparently sent an offer letter to, and then subsequently onboarded, the wrong candidate. How's your Monday?
Randomize
