Beverly Hills, 90210. Cleveland Browns, 0.
I don't know what's more sad having a rewards account at a liquor store or already racking up 273 dollar points since january
So currently I have a block of cheese duct taped to my air conditioner in lieu of a fridge.
maybe if i keep dancing i won't throw up
I got a phone call from security asking me to do my laundry wearing more than a blanket next time.
he told me not to treat him like a child and then started peeing off the trampoline
cracked out the beer snorkel again. that thing has a five for five record of getting me naked.
official rule: if your drunk, it doesn't count
then nothing in my life counts
What I do when I'm blackout drunk is none of my business.
So after taking my shirt off, he pulls my bra off like a hockey jersey. FUCKIN PRO. Guy knew what he wanted.
I'm gonna chug this bud light an might injure this high school penis, like I'm 17 again
Dude, tumbleweeds have been rolling through my bed lately. This is my dryest dry spell since I was married.
I'm still not sure how to feel about the fact that we had a threesome with a guy the same age as my dad
also, when i showed up he started talking to me and eventually asked me if the girls treated me well. i went on to talk about my sex life. he was talking about his secretaries.
your mission the party friday: cockblock me at ALL costs. I've cheated on my boyfriend twice. I feel like three times would be crossing some sort of line...
and no, I don't care how how hot he is
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