i hate sounding clingy, but i just wanted to verify i wasn't an asshole in your mind
i just ordered an al pacino with double mocha at starbucks.. i'm waiting to see how long it takes the chick to realize what i said.
Four minutes until I can fart!
i have now learned nap means the same thing as sex in college
She tried to keep her legs crossed last night while doing a keg stand. Way to keep it classy.
i just realized that fran drescher is the 90's version of a guidette.
If you win this game of words with friends, ill suck you off for 30 minutes. No lie.
I cant last that long. Do i get the rollover minutes?
So currently I have a block of cheese duct taped to my air conditioner in lieu of a fridge.
I'm not sure which is worse. The fact that I slept with him last night, or the fact that you did too.
Okay throwing up in my mouth a little = time to go home
In the 2nd smartest move of my day your ringtone for when you call is now the Space Jam theme.
So do you want to be the old guy picking up a girl in a mini skirt who may be slightly buzzed before noon from college, or shall i walk over?
Dougie got over his pride nerves. Found him dancing on a float wearing nothing but rainbow boxers.
You have no concept of how high I am, do you?
why the hell are you crying over taco bell?
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