dude. i was so high. i watched shrek in russian.
.....so he has a son. Josh. That is not his roommate
still doesn't change the fact you were dunking your sock in the toilet.
i told you he always needs adult supervision he just tazered himself
If I don't have herpes this will be the single greatest day of my life
Sorry I kept grabbing your vagina at the casino. I believed it was my lucky unicorn to win bonuses
I told him I would only take his calls if he was dead, dying, capturing a midget, or buying me shots.
I stand by my new policy.
I saw a guy do a line this morning in line to start the 5k, happy thanksgiving!
Do you know that you can buy Cialis in Mexico? Best. Honeymoon. Ever.
If it makes u feel any better my dick feels pretty tender dude
Left my house last night with a girlfriend, $200 in my wallet, and 10 finger nails. Came home with no girlfriend, an empty wallet, and 9 1/2 finger nails.
Yea, I had a bad night too aha
Just got back to the apartment. Why os there now 14 identical toothbrushes in the bathroom and only the two of us live here?
It may be a corded vibrator from the 90s but it gets the job DONE
ready for a night of bad decisions, horrible moral standards, and an unhealthy amount of illegal substances.
No. It's going to be "I'm mad that it took you so long to get over here" angry sex.
Randomize
