Who wears a wallet chain?!
I think my tv knows when im high and tells taco bell
I was just texting to see if your vagina was working yet.
i wish i was a boy too so i knew what a blow job felt like
I take that as "no I'm not driving you to the bar in a blizzard"
when I said energy drinks I meant cocaine
I like to think it's an accomplishment that I can relate my life to a T-pain song
THE HALLOWEEN QUEST WILL BE PICS OF US IN OUR COSTUMES IN EXCHANGE FOR DICK PICS. IT HAS BEEN DECIDED.
Because I know nothing is hotter than ocean themed dick pics on SnapChat...
I may be going to Mexico. I just met a drug dealer at a strip club. Seems legit.
when I called the strip club they said there was a note with my credit card. "girl who punched guy in throat" fuck daytona
2 weeks into this dating someone with money thing and I already don't know if I can go back to the being poor life
I jumped the fence at the bar last night. My dress got stuck and I ended up flashing the entire patio for a good 30 seconds.
At the 10 second mark everyone started to whistle and cheer. Free drinks all night
PANTIES FOUND
Legit hope my Trump humping Brother dies of this shit so I can stop pretending to still love him.
Randomize
