Five Mah tais Laser and i skill have not drunk dial you
2 am we went back to his house. his mom handed us beers and cooked us pancakes. the next morning his dad had washed my car. i lied. living at home after college definitely does not suck.
all i know is that each time we woke up we were at a different chinese restaurant. help.
Is there a word for someone who only has sex with NFL prospects?
I miss the good ol' days when we would yell at strangers from your balcony while wearing our mexican ponchos in the middle of the day.
what ever happened to our old dealer?
Come down here. We are watching people walk through the paper we taped in front of the elevator.
My goal is to upperdeck the house I'm at, because it's some girl I don't know's birthday. Welcome to adulthood, bitch.
Finding a keg in our kitchen would be like god personally high fiving each of us.
Well my sources tell me she just happens to appear in an episode girls gone wild.
I know someone that will spend hours looking for her. He also has many of said movies. And I will do it for free!
My roommate comes home screaming, I brought you home a friend! I thought she brought me a guy...no, she brought home a one-eyed shih tzu.
I just took the batteries out of the xbox remote so she could replace the dead ones in her vibrator If that's not love I don't know what is
You ask too many questions when I'm blowing you. You're like a dentist asking how my day has been during a cleaning.
When you wake up on the bus on 139th but you're staying at 6th
133 to go
Be happy for me... Or horny... Or be a really good friend and feel what I want you to feel. Jealousy
They made the paper for stealing gnomes. I fucked a local celebrity.
Randomize
