which bright sisters idea was it to put semi-formal in the middle of no-shave november?
i dont know if you remember blowing your vomity nose directly into my hand...yeah thanks for that
No sexy Asian girl. No comfy bed. I'm just gonna lie here in the hall next to the garbage can until someone comes home.
stuck in traffic next to occupy boston. smells like patchouli and unshaven pubes
She still cant shoot whiskey?
Im having serious doubts about this relationship
Is "when in doubt date the guy with the bigger dick" a good philosophy?
He looked at me like he knew me, and I looked at him like I had seen his penis before.
that's the second time I've left that bar and slept with the person that's driven my car. thank god I don't take cabs..
When someone's woman crush wednesday is an ultrasound of her unborn daughter...
I can't
I just had a spiritual connection with my sweater and did ballet in the hallway. Alone. I'd say we're gonna chalk that up as a win for marijuana and call it a night
You are one with the wind and sky, bro.
We helped him hit the bowl to the point that he didn't even have to move
when u match a guy bc he's from Oregon & he's trying to flirt, shut up i just want to talk about trees
Is it bad that we left the kid passed out on the bus? I think his name was texas. I was too drunk to be questioning this.
She sent me a thank you card for not fucking her boyfriend...
Randomize
