The bird has been looking kind of ugly lately...gotta look nice to fly with the hawk ya know?
More tranny stories later!
I knew my chances of getting laid had increased after she walked into my room and yelled "DICK TIME"
I learned the names of so many hookups when they read them at graduation
She has puke in her hair, is missing a shoe and is now crying. People trust her to be their child's teacher
Second time this week margarita night turned homoerotic
Oh, that was the alley that I ate a pine cone in.
Yeah I mean I think I need to stop living off of snacks and alcohol
Judging by his bulge. This guy is going home with me. Who doesn't want a dick that looks like it used to be a pillar in Rome.
I'm proud of you for choosing to be an organ donor on your fake!!
I signed the divorce papers. Can I get a blowjob now?
I fully support your bad decision but I do not approve of your unironic use of the word yolo
Well now you know my birthday fantasy: gangbang consisting of men wearing NPR pledge t-shirts.
This bitch goes out driving during the nor'easter to get her ass eaten.. that’s dedication
I AM OFFICIALLY LICENSED TO BE A LESBIAN
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