Idk. We dropped acid and Kevin ran away again. We didn't find him for like 3 hours.
Man I wish I had been there
Yah we found him in the pool shed of some elderly couple. They were on the porch watching all of the shenanigans. ...To be young again.
you can't exactly throw up or pass out at the pentagon so i had to pull my shit together
it was like watching bambi learning to walk, if bambi was 22 and a high functioning alcoholic.
she added emergen-c to the bong-water bro, brilliant.
I tried giving you a bj last night and all you could manage was "Haha that tickles" and "in the morning"
good it was pretty cute, also what would bong water do to a puppy?
I don't think it's considwred fine dining when you're passing out at golden palace in chinatown at 4 am with you boss who happens to be wearing a dress.
Was I asleep on the ride home?
Yea, then when I tried to hold your head up on a turn, you round house punched me in the face.
Conversations we need to have while high 1) how mermaids reproduce 2) if blind people hallucinate what do they see 3) reincarnation
Thanks for having me over last night. Sorry I licked rum off your kitchen floor.
He called me kiddo. We can't have sex
She made me pour olive oil on her.
I passed up getting laid last night. It's almost been a YEAR - what the Hell was I thinking, being so choosy??
havent showered in 2 days. just Febrezed my balls in the car before going into a movie alone with a 40 of Guinness.there isn't a word in English for how single I am.
No I dont want him to bring his twin brother, cause then ill have to entertain him with my vagina
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