it wouldnt have been so bad but she still had the cowboy hat on when my mom walked in
We did it and he fell asleep and I was bored so I decided to go back to the party...is that bad?
I swear it's like I have a jerk off quota I have to meet each week. If I miss three days I have a wet dream and it's like a wasted jizz, and it gets everywhereeeeeee.
There is a slip-n-slide in the hallway and a girl just did it topless cuz I told her it was my birthday. Where are you?
You're the third person who's asked me for an afternoon blow connection in one day. Unreal.
That's more of a you-issue than a me-issue
The bartender charged us for drinks. Life is different.
I LOVE YOU NO MATTER HOW MANY BALLS YOUVE SUCKED
Talk about an dramatic entrance, girl rolled up on a stolen bike and was wearing heels and a dress, through it on the ground and said "you guys want a bike?" Of course i jumped on that shit, any sane person would!
No man we're leaving now. The party will probably be busted soon. O and a bitch started throwing knives around the place, like real actual knives.
I think I sold my soul to a dominatrix last night.
The power of the half flaccid cock, and to think, I thought I was just playing accordion in front of her Vagina!
I have nice boobs. Don't wanna deprive anyone of the experience.
You're a saint.
I'll start working on my manners when you stop using please and thank you in the bedroom.
in the future we should consider sippy cups so we can drink and passout accordingly
saying im screwed is like saying the titanic took on a little water.
Randomize
