nothing tight i'm going to stuff myself with food and alchy
Solid performance last night. Wanna be fuck buddies?
He bought me ice cream and then I gave him a bj
I think that's fair trade off
You wouldn't stop crying and screaming Hilary Duff doesn't deserve Gossip Girl
connan obrien reminds me of an asparagus spear
Dude, she looked like the Canadian Slam Poet, neck hair and all.
I just made Jack Daniels snow cones.
Acid flashbacks - fact or fiction? Have been seeing a surprising amount of sparkly shit this afternoon...
THC water in my coffee on the way to work. How's your Tuesday?
I'm confused are we getting high or did someone actually die?
Sorry, all I could picture was you jamming your dick into a lemon.
Do I get bonus points if I get lockjaw after a cosmic blowjob?
I just need you to stay far enough away that I can't smell your cologne. I completely forget that I fucking hate you as soon as I smell it.
I found a tomato seed inside my jeans. I did not eat tomatoes
On a scale of one to 10 how Risky is it to sleep with a married man (all morals set aside)
Randomize
