So Ive decided I have serious issues. Im walking around the school with a bag labeled booze money collecting from people while slightly hungover at 8:20 in the morning, and nobody is questioning me.
He said "I know I'm not gay. I fucked a guy once and didn't like it"
I was thinking of baby names while I was giving him a blow job
We found them in a dumpster making out trying to get their privacy
I need to find my pants, a way out of here, and a cheeseburger.
I feel strange, like something is off with my body
Yeah that's called sobering up, we've been drunk for the past 4 days
Still breathing?
Still breathing , but quite out of it. I think I hallucinated like 20 action sequences.
What.
We watched scrubs, then I got a shower blowjob which led to shower sex and the living room floor sex. Now she's baking cookies. I may not be studying, but I'm doing something right.
Everyone was in the walk-in getting high, and I had to be all cool. Serving soup and salads. Night manager status doesn't pay enough.
I woke up this morning half naked, smelling like an ash tray, with an empty bottle of jack next to me, and now someone named Dora the anal explorer is texting me.
purchased gas station taquitos and condoms at 4 this morning. It has been magical..
I sense lesbianism
That's a weird power
Also barcrawl friday. You ARE wearing a tiara
I think even the taco bell employees judged me
I love you man I just want to hold you and fuck you until you only know my name
I don't know who you are but HOW THE FUCK DID YOU GET MY NUMBER
Randomize
