The two bassists just totally made out. I NEED MENNA'S RIGHT now.
he pointed at my clit and asked with a confused face, 'whats this thingy??"
You know your in college when you decide house chores with games of beer pong...
You would get kicked out of the study lounge for being drunk the monday of finals week
I went to check the drunk texts i sent last night but my phone deleted them already. Even my phone is ashamed.
They woke me up at 6am and made me drink a bottle pf champagne yelling "champagne breakfast!"
This dude is being a total douche
Just because it's Christmas Eve does not mean the liquor store has to give you a free bottle of peppermint schnapps
Their car went through the first bag of wine on the drive up...clearly 6 bags was not enough.
Hickey on my chest, threw out my elbow and now walking out my shame.
Youre getting too old for this
Just bought koolaid for my vodka in a DARE shirt with my NES wallet. I'm everything I thought I'd be when I was 8.
Except even better, boobs get discounts.
Just witnessed my roommate pick her nose and eat it in her sleep. Remember, you made out with that.
Come out Saturday. It's for my lesbian daughter from the future birthday.
You told the cashier at McDonald's not to smell the ones cause you had just got back from the strip club. Good deed.
He rubbed my back afterwards. I forgot how to talk and I legitimately thought I was a cat for a few minutes.
mom is telling me the setting in which I was conceived
did you know we used to have a pool?
Randomize
