You're the unicorn of the gay community. Unbelievable and unattainable.
Don't interrupt me, I have a limited time to be high and thus be remarkably good at Pac Man
as if moving home wasnt embarassing enough, mom picked up my laundry while i was gone. guess who needs to find a new hiding spot for his cum towel..this guy.
THEY ARE MY AGE. THEY ARE YOUR LITTLE SISTER'S AGE THIS IS A DELICATE MATTER. CAPS LOCK
I just discovered the Reese's pieces and sourdough bread sandwich. No signs of coming down.
From scraping the remnants from a coke bag at a lingerie party to meeting with an 80 year old man to discuss civil rights all in under 12 hours bizarrely feels like the epitome of my life
I can't even tell you how many rave sticks I tore apart with my teeth last night.
I would fuck him In a heartbeat, an obese child running up stairs with an irregular heartbeat, heartbeat.
She was pouring Goldschlager in my mouth during the shower sex. How can you NOT like her?
P.S. I just made up pleasure scepter for the purpose of that last message.
I distinctly remember telling him "I'll suck your dick while you eat pizza"
I haven't even sucked a boob is 6 weeks I hate not college
SOOOOOO I just attempted to go to the gym, hungover. Ended up throwing up in the bathroom. I hope people think I'm just working out really hard
Quick question. If you break the bathroom sink off the wall from fucking on it, can you claim it on your homeowner's insurance as a 'natural disaster'?
Just do what I do and listen to your vagina. She’ll growl when she smells good dick
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