Courtney? Is that you? I have pictures of this very same night.
well it doesn't count as a walk of shame if he drops you off at your class in his golf cart
They let me out of the holding cell just in time for me to get the morning-after-pill. Rock bottom feels even worse with all those hormones.
I was chocking and even did the sign for it..And you continued to just laugh
and now her best friend is massaging my table under the leg. this may not end well.
in my defence, i did try to get you to put your shirt back on, then you screamed at me to stop telling you what to do
Doing lines of coke with a $100 dollar bill off a 6in x 9in photo of your childhood self really tells you where you where you've gotten in life.
can't decide if i look like a hooker or a missing member of Poison today
NoShamevember. You game?
Chang gave me a 1.5 gallon beer tasting cup, i have a new boyfriend with a huge stick, Members of the Irish Rugby team slapped my ass and cheered for firmness, and a couple of strangers are naming the child after me. Best. Weekend.Ever.
My boobs are literally freaking out because I've been wearing a bra for more than three hours....I need to go out more...
The guy I hooked up with last night left me alone with his dog AND IT JUST SHIT ON THE FLOOR. WHAT DO I DO
This whole quitting my bad habits all at once is really messing with my ability to function.
WHY didn't you stop me from ordering $900 worth of socks last night when I was very obviously judgement impaired at the time?!?!
I would offer you moral support, but I have questionable morals..
Randomize
