They should make Glad Forceflex condoms.
just got a hand job during a movie in class today is gonna be great!
why does the wii remote smell like your vag?
she smells like cat throw up and cupcakes. i'm trying to focus on the cupcakes but it's really. hard.
omg. MEgabus. stoned.
Theres these two guys talking.
Are we doing anything tonight after class for Valentine's Day or just being lazy and having sex?
If you expect me to say anything other than 'lazy and sex' you're crazzzzy!
What can i say, i'm an artist. I think deep thoughts. In between the homoerotica and pterodactyl noises
I just feel like everything is too perfect
He's probably a serial killer or chronic masturbator
Or both. Which is common
DONT TALK SHIT ABOUT LUNCHABLES
I thought my sex drive was gone but let me tell you it is back with a vengeance
I feel like sleeping with foreign people is a long term investment. It's like a time share. Now when I go to London I have a place to stay.
If God is analyzing my life right now extremely proud or dissapointed but either way I took wednesday night drinkin to new levels
These random guys found me. They told me not to wander in the woods and i remember saying 'am i fucking Bambi?! I'm not gonna walk into woods!' then i threw up.
Im going for myspace 2006 goth bitch. Your worst nightmare
BRB. These cougars are squabbling over my junk and one of them is offering to pay my tuition
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