I have to decide between the hot young blond with no apparent gag reflex, and the brunette with a great ass and a trust fund.
history professor just told us he has magic fingers. i'm going for it.
Just used my last prints at the library for brackets instead of final reviews. Hello March.
You're going to have to buy me a lot of drinks before the bee suit goes on...
New term. "Find a husband" fridays. It's like thirsty thursdays, but with a dowry.
just lying in bed drinking beer with a straw waiting for motivation. why?
at the hospital. the stripper fell on his face when she was trying to grab the dollar bill out of his mouth with her ass. broken nose for sure.
Just received a visit from the Ghost of Bad Decisions Past. Kind of weird 90% of the flashbacks happened in the same sixteen month span, the rest happened at Taco Bell.
There's an old guy having a conversation with his penis in the bathroom right now.
how many ponies have to be on my pajama pants to convince him im gay?
i think we need a new approach.
I didn't think four grown drunk men could cuddle on a twin size bed, but we found a way.
Preparing for the bar exam has made my whatever disorder you said I have act up again
She rode my dick so hard I momentarily lost hearing. I guarantee I had the better St Patrick's.
And god said thou shalt never deny free booze. And it was good.
sometimes i just have a bad day n consider lowering my standards
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