my mom heard me say 'don't squirt that at me' while me & him were in my room. She then decided to call my aunt and complain to her that she has the sluttiest daughter in town. she refused to believe me when i told her i was talking about gel.
I'm with your mom on this one.
I told him I'm not paying rent anymore because he's seen my boobs.
I am stoned and watching Pocahontas. I am letting the kids eat whatever they want. I am the best babysitter in the whole wide world
ol I'll be okay, it's only a christmas party so the worst that could happen is I end up playing madden naked again
I actually had to roll up my long sleeves to masturbate. I hate the winter
If I start taking birth control 8 days after we had sex do you think it'll stop the baby from being made?
You were doing downward dog and puking off my deck at the same time.
This needs to stop. I just vacuumed the wall. Adderall is a double edged sword.
It's been 5 months since I last wore a condom.
Not including when spray tanning
I lost all of my bathing suit tops.. This is both a success and a failure
It's Breast Cancer Awareness Month!!!! What random hook up should check my tata's this year?!?!
I'm just going to have crazy good sex with him until one of us developed feelings that works in the movies right?
And we had three hours of crazy sex then his roommate ate pizza off me while I was sleeping.
Yeah, he hid all the toilet paper and took a video of me looking for it before I shit my pants. Definitely playing that clip at our wedding.
Hey! you should come over!
Who is this? The number is saved as "Sexy Awesome"
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