Do you have a straightener and are extra lubricated condoms not the norm?
I'm going to rape someone's good day.
i've got to stop sleeping with short guys. they always turn into stage 5 clingers
Honey, I don't care how "classic you" this is. It's not gonna matter if we can't find you in the morning.
you can hold your grudge or you can accept the alcoholic treats as a peace offering. your choice
peace be with you.
He was so drunk he was throwing the bowling balls into other lanes on purpose. He still beat my high score thought.
Just walked into a random hotel for the free breakfast. How was your night?
I am pretty sure they consider me one of the "bros". They compliment girl's racks to me and are the human forms of dick-be-gone. They won't sleep with me more than once cause it's "weird", or let any "untrustworthy boys" sleep with me and I still help them get laid. Not...fair...
Dunno yet. Probably just gonna play the s.t.d. russian roulette game with random bartenders at the beach again. Same 'ol same 'ol
Nothing shouts "I'm single" like a thousand needlepoint pillows.
Oh my god and he smells like heaven wrapped in a beard of knowledge
When you went off to sleep with that guy that looked like a dirty Jesus and I asked why all you had to say "trying to keep Christ in Christmas" and left. The Vatican called, you're going to Hell.
I hope you get your threesome on vday. I'll probably get flowers and a candlelit dinner. trade you. I wish this guy was more of a slut and had less of a heart. I would like 2 dicks please fuck your flowers!
There's a stripper getting there at 10 though so hopefully I'm out before the stripper gets there. I don't have time to deal with a stripper.
Lol, yeah it'll be fun,but will it be cereal and dick pics fun?
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