Yo I'm just eating dinner now. U ready to go out?
Ya ya. Where you eating?
Cereal and beer. U kno u want in.
# days @ Coachella: 1 people i showed how to break it down: 279
our school mascot just walked into class and threw condoms everywhere. welcome to college
Pregaming class all semester has made this final review session more like my introduction to the topic.
I think we should bring back the casual nipple tassel
We now know how the night ended in arrest according to the flip camera I did 10 handle pulls and beer bonged a 40. My life choices are getting worse and worse this is your fault.
Dramatic love triangle! I guess mystery Asian and I will just have to fight it out for your love.
You screamed "I NEED TO GET THE WHOLE SET!" and then proceeded to try touching everyone's balls in the room
Mom just sent me an email. The subject line is "How to avoid a urinary tract infection"
LET IT GO MOM
My one night stand said I love you, opened my fridge, stole my cream cheese and left.
It's not even 11, i dropped a shot glass, nick is bleeding, and everyone is drunk
I'm still home, my life isn't together. Currently drying my pants
Love that I’m sending my uber driver a thank you message for taking me home via mcdonalds tonight before I’m messaging my date from tonight! Lol
He’s over 6 feet has amazing posture and went to Harvard and has an awesome job and a great dick and loves Jesus and is an organ donor
Is this the guy you have listed as free food in your phone
Noooo he’s listed as free food #5
My first hangover at work. I'm officially an adult.
Randomize
