She has HUUUUUUUGE nipples
just caught grandpa beating off in the living room
so for future reference,at what point did you feel like a line had been crossed?
And why did 3 people fail to stop me from literally getting a piggy back ride from the bar to his apartment?!
Go to petsmart and tell me if the dog trainer is the guy I slept with friday. Thanks.
No, not at all. Pulling a condom out of your vag at 2pm is NOTHING like finding $10 in your winter coat. Stop trying to make me feel better.
So I managed to get the bitch who has been copying off me all semester in History to copy the names of Pokemon towns off my test.
Can we be in one of those super weird relationships where you carry me around everywhere?
I cnant read. Cheetos goen. Help. Grt Cheetos.
You just said you hate yourself then sent me a picture of your friend's penis. Clearly this is a night of honesty.
Just text the random number in my iphone notes that was entered at 1am. Should be interesting.
I WOLD FCUK YUO INTOO THE MOON
THE MOOOOOOOON
Next time I pee on a car, I'll text you.
I just dropped a chicken nugget on the floor and seriously prayed that it would be ok....I think this job is making me crazy.
the voting booth dude cock blocked me or she woulda totally blown me in the voting booth.
Randomize
