Seriously, stop being so datable w your movie/song prefs
They say you shouldnt they say its no good for the environment in your vagina
I woke up (not at home) to find out I kissed Ryan Caberra, flashed for free gumbys and carried around an inflatable moose named Johnson. Great success.
Just found out Brianna Frost the Pornstar goes to my school. Makes that $35,000 tuition that more valuable.
I'm a 23 year old virgin. I've masturbated in ways you can't even imagine.
i just declared my major based on how close the department building was to our apartment. laziness has been brought to a new level
He asked me "did you used to go to church" while we were having sex.
I'm never waking up next to someone after sex again. It's alllll downhill from there.
Is cat milk safe for human consumption?
The toilet wouldn't flush at the club so I literally just shat in the garbage.
Last night she walked off and disappeared from everyone got home at 330 and said she went to the casino with her cab driver.
We just fucked each other sober. #goteam
taking shots alone in my kitchen before I go learn to give a lapdance. when did this become my life?
Ex-boyfriend shit on a ping pong table at a party last night. Taking "party pooper" to a whole new level.
so i find a box of condoms inside my car with turn by turn directions to her bedroom... kinda freaked out cause she got my address and somehow inside my car
Randomize
