I want to bang chis in dee ass burt he be hating on me times two. Me be tryin ti love onu
Bendover
I'm half single.
Please tell me it's the bottom half.
have you ever noticed that homeless people never have acne. suck it proactive
im hiding in a corner. drunk. with a plate of stolen jello shots. im pretty sure people are looking for me or the jello shots.
Just did coke off of a cross necklace and am headed to the strip club. Happy Easter!
The alcohol just runs so smoothly thru my veins.
note to self: shower sex when you have 7 stitches in your leg is never a good idea. never.
Want to do me the honour of waxing my legs again before I go to Mexico? I feel like it's a tradition we shouldn't break.
when we woke up this morning she was missing two teeth. the front two.
He has a British accent. He could read me the phone book and I would come so hard he would need a wizened old man in a rowboat to save him.
I'm at the level of despair that only Panda Express can fix
Just drink your champagne out of a trophy like a fuckin winner
He was going down on me and all I could think about was how proud of me you'd be
You gave me the best orgasm of my life. I'm buying you a house
Damn, I just did coke with a dude in a bathroom and after he took his dick out right in front of me and took a piss. What a power move.
Randomize
