I just got a rly sharp new razor and was shaving down there...
and?
RIP clitoris
Any girl that compares her vag to a hot ham sandwich is beyond a slut
Woke up in 100% not my clothes this morning. Third time this month. Fuck. Tequila.
He's got a wife and three kids but I'm into being that mistake.
idk. I was on the deck with Dominic and i felt something weird on my arm. I looked down and you were licking my elbow.
Whoever was the last to get in from the chinese firedrill had to pay the dealer.
I had fun watching you interact with the world around you. Like a fuckin 8 year old kid who just discovered build a bear but really wants a cigarette.
Hey.. Here's a thought for the evening. There's only two more sleeps until I fuck you so hard my back teeth will convulse.. Here's too Tuesday! Woohooooo
Just got into a fight with a trashcan, today is obviously not going to be my day.
Just saw a couple chasing each other on lawn mowers. Oh South Knoxville.
i woke up with fake boobs glued on my chest and a large black dildo on my hand. then i had to dress myself and walk home. people saw.
Word my sister pulled through for me and brought vodka shooters for the plane. its about to be a sloppy 4 hours
I think I'm in the negatives for the quantity of fucks given today.
I shouldn't have that kind of responsibility when the prospect of being high is readily available. All I could do was hula hoop and smoke cigarettes last night. My remembrance of anything important was out the window.
I ate all your munchie Mac and Cheese cause you left me on the lawn. If you don't want it to happen gain, drag my drunk ass inside next time
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