it was like fucking the hulk in a smartcar
i think the whole apartment complex could hear you beating off last night
well i was about to unbutton his pants but then i realized they had an elastic waste-band, so no, that didnt happen
We named our saturday intramural dodgeball team "we're hungover". Pretty much just an excuse to fuel my alcoholism on friday nights.
She wants out first dance to be to 98 degrees i do cherish you...remember how i said we didn't need open bar....
I've see this movie. You sext me after the bar and fall asleep mid sentence. Roll credits.
I think he finally resigned to the fact he could not get off. He just looked at me and said "I'm having testicle difficulties," rolled over and passed out.
at one point i was feeding a guy sour cream chips and he made me make the "choo choo" noise as they were going in. \ni feel so much closer to him now.\n
Wackin it to the USA womens soccer team. My own personal way of saying job well done.
Penises. Everywhere.
You're. Welcome.
Because you work where i will be drunk tonight I'm asking you. Is a shirt required on Halloween?
We haven't been trashed enough to shut down a bar together in four days. I'm starting to worry that we're growing apart.
Then she looked me straight in the eyes and asked me if I missed my foreskin. Weirdest conversation ever.
Are you trying to say I've made an emotionally well rounded transformation similar to the Grinch?
She asked how comfortable I was with her while we were in the shower. She then proceeded to pee in said shower.
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