How long until YT realizes that it's a man?
Phease come get me i thought i was in a place i don't even understand
Driving with balloons in your car is more annoying than that bubble fart that doesn't leave your ass after your previous fart.
True Life: I puke at bars and try to catch it in my hand...then walk away like it didn't happen
i couldnt tell she was wearing a bumpit until she started giving me head
I wish there was some sort of "recently added" function for blackberrys so i could see what random numbers i got from the night before
Ok I can't be your drugdealer AND booty call AND friend. It just doesn't work that way
I'm drinking Dom Perignon from the bottle with a straw just to piss of some french dude.
Got high and weighed everything in the house. My head is 16.2 pounds. Is that ok?
He just sent me a picture of himself naked while cooking pancakes and he made the caption "bitchin' in the kitchen"
Want to go swimsuit shopping? First one who cries buys ice cream.
That moment when your whole family facetimed you just moments before you threw up all over the entire living room
Not to play devil's advocate, but, considering how our species has evolved so far... I'm kinda rooting for the sun on the whole heat death thing.
not sure what the chiropractor did but my junk deserves a cape now.
Also I like oatmeal more than sex.
Randomize
