Prostitute standing on the corner thrusting at cars as they drive by. New marketing strategy?
i came out of the bathroom and he had christmas lights wrapped up his leg, around his boner, and down the other side
That would explain his violent outburst while watching barefoot contessa...
once you have herpes you dont really care what goes in your mouth anymore.
We probably shouldn't have forced that guys cat to drink the grey goose while we were doing lines in his bathroom
There was a community pot of Ramen, and if you were in the pool you were either fully clothes or ass naked.
maybe volvos are so family friendly and safe because they're extremely uncomfortable to get fucked on.
I just stole a conducting baton from the chicago symphony orchestra... i have to stop drinking on weeknights
I was high and he had on a gorilla suit. Of course I had to take a picture with him
Your a disgrace to smokers everywhere
Watching him is like watching a star slowly implode
i snuck out to taco bell in my hospital gown earlier
And as drunk as I was I was able to show my mom how to make text italicized in Microsoft word
I went to smoke a bowl and realized that my lighter is out and there's still frozen blueberries in my bong... I need to reevaluate my life...
Next thing I know her tits are out on my desk. It was straight out of a porno. What was I supposed to do I’m not made of stone
The cat's telling me to stop taking acid, and to start doing the lords work. I'm almost 99% sure he's talking about the dark lord.
THIS CAT'S GOING TO TURN INTO A SNAKE AND KILL ME! GET OVER HERE NOW! BRING YOUR WAND.
Randomize
