I want to do you till i cant cum anymore. Till all i get is a little flag that says "bang".
Last night you told her she was rocking the beer gut. Still wondering why you have that black eye?
I love how understanding people are when they hear we first hooked up getting high and watching nature shows
We are going to get clementines. And shoot them out of a ballon launcher. That's after we come up to the ivy with a bullhorn and reck havoc. Where are you.
God, for the last time, no I did not break my nose doing a keg-stand just for a nose job.
Steve just broke his bong and some kid in an american flag bathing suit and no shirt just fell down the stairs. Its dangerous here
Blasting venetian snares and drinking a beer. I love being an adult. It's like being a child but with beer for breakfast, better music, and no one yells at you.
I think sneezing out coked up boogers onto your professor disqualifies you from the "I was sick" excuse
Whiskey dick is like insurance for making bad decisions
That feeling when you're ready to convert to the religion of whatever god will stop the vomit. Dynamite is illegal.
Dude for real though, we gotta stop getting hammered and kissing gay guys.
Shaving your balls drunk sounds like a good idea untill you do it
well i maturbated this morning, which means the best part of my day has already happened.
Well, personally I like to keep my blackmail in well organised folders.
Remember that time I came to London for 4 hours, got hammered, cried for an hour and then left.
Randomize
