I'm pretty sure that he just gave me the ginger disease
census says that i am hotter than the girl you just left with...sad for you
proudest moment: just made a guy walk into a parked car with his mouth hanging open cause of the shirt im wearing.
my mom noticed the "toothpaste" stain on my tshirt...she repeatedly attempted to get it off by licking her thumb and rubbing it. See Jenn it obviously doesnt taste that bad...
Totally just sport flirted the shit out of a girl on a wheelchair. I've done my good deed for the day.
I got to masturbate in Rome in a gorgeous hotel room. Don't try and tell me I need a boyfriend
im eating mac and cheese with a makeup brush. there is wayyyyy too much wrong with this night.
Let's just do a victory lap through all of our exes.
The word cocktail makes me want to rip my liver out and nail it to a cross.
I am gifting my birthday sex to you, but its okay because I can always just have birthday vibrator.
just bought myself a "your about to get violated in every way so you deserve this chipotle" steak bowl.
I just saw a kid on iowa campus story that looked like the guy i made out with on spring break.
If I'm able to walk tomorrow morning, I'm gonna be really disappointed with myself...
I am playing in the snow in my bunny outfit. GET OVER HERE
I think I'm the first girl to break a bed with a guy, without even having sex with him while doing so.
Randomize
