My penis is the apex of life and all other references. Lookin for a cheap vagina at this point. And cheap Korean BBQ
the bulge in his pants is not junk. its hair. trust.
Apparently getting drunk, buying a guitar from your local costco and walking in to an open mic night is not the same as rocking out to guitar hero...
It was literally the size of a half eaten tic tac.
you were having sex in the bathroom so i pee'd in your bong water...
I head back to the dorms in less than a week I'm not ready to see my roomate naked that much again.
Just sucked my third dick in the past twelve hours. I must want AIDS.
I'd say the best part of the party was when you screamed to everyone that you were gettin dome on the reg
He made me leave when I challenged "all you bitches" to a game of strip taboo.
Just saw pictures of a pregnant teen from my hometown with an American flag wrapped around her naked body posted on FB without irony. These are my roots.
Seriously, this apartment is covered in body glitter. This chick musta been a huuuuuge slut. How do you get it across every surface?
Do you have any forwarding contact info?
I was told to keep my leg elevated. I assume it means to keep my legs on the air, it's like I was prescribed to be slutty
I just sneezed glitter I JUST SNEEZED G LITTER I j u st SneeZED GLIT TER I DO NOT HAVE TIME FOR THIS AT ALL.
My joke about liking my coffee like I like my men IS ABOUT TO COME TRUE.
I was giving him head and he slipped one of those hats with propellors on top on my head.
Randomize
