yep. he's not circumcised. how did it take me six months to realize THAT?
there was a guy who was being paid to stand outside of Abercrombie without a shirt on... normally i would be okay with this but he was 40...
She's dressed as a slutty Dalmatian. I doubt she has morals.
Because if the best sex I've ever had was with a gay guy, then God help me.
I apologize for getting really drunk, taking off my shirt, bitching someone out, crying, and breaking something at your party next weekend...
judging by my wet hair I would guess I showered at the bartenders apt last night?
My chest hair is, as we speak, arching upward to embrace my neck beard. The union will be a storied one.
Sometimes I actually rage on Tuesday, come back, and do homework drunk and pull an all nighter.
The inflatable penis from those pics was mine... We broke him that night
the amount of times i have been intoxicated, barefoot, and in a robe at 3 am at the quick check by your house is impressive, especially since i live an hour away
Happy 4th. Did you guys get your syphilis thing taken care of?
What the World Series means to me is that I've slept with too many giants fans.
bitch dont make me pour hotsauce in your vagina
DO NOT PREHEAT THE OVEN THIS MORNING! WE STARTED USING IT AS A WINE STASH AROUND MIDNIGHT.
My lack of taco bell is hindering me from seeing the good part of that situation
Randomize
