he wasnt completely random
you're right. you met him once and didnt know his name. you still dont
i get things done.
Two kids are drinking pounders in class. I think I'm hanging out with the wrong group of friends.
I asked him how he was going to celebrate tomorrow and he said "tits, clits, and bong hits"
Nah, I'm just going to keep fucking him until he realizes we're perfect for each other.
Only you could be admitted to the ER and walk out with a nurse's phone number. I wish I was gay
There are pictures of you on the shoulders of some old guy dressed as borat
Ok well I'll be up all night studying if you need a wake up call or a place to put your penis.
If your boss lets you sleep on his couch, you don't pay him back by boning his daughter.
I have to date her we need a place to stay for tailgating
Being engaged is strange. I looked at my cock this morning and said, "we did alright these last 32 years, right?"
I dont remember you getting a condom thrown at you. I think I had a concusion
Why does my nose taste spicy?
How do you know what your nose tastes like?
Every morning should start with 2 orgasms and a shoulder massage
I tried to breakup with him by telling I had a threesome. He one upped me by saying he had a 5-some so I couldn’t do it.
Are we allowed to ho on the roof?
Randomize
