he quoted Bring It On. It's over.
We just picked up about 540 lbs of women....
He gave his mom his old phone, and I am SO paranoid
Did you send adult things?
Um. Yes would be the understatement of the year
So I've officially decided that I AM that drunken mistake that girls hate themselves for in the morning.
i don't know where i am. i made bad decisions. i think this guy is dead.
first day of class and my professor asked me if i was going to come to class drunk all semester.
My ex best friend's ex fuck buddy is visiting. There was no other option but day drinking.
My class coordinator for bio told us that the only thing we should do the night before an exam is to get laid. And then party down after the exam. I like him.
Nothing like having your house arrest ankle bracelet vibrate and take a moisture sample at the exact moment you're about to blow it in some chick...buzzkill
So what's your itinerary for Amsterdam?
Show up, get drunk, get laid, try not to miss my flight home.
he said "I would have fucked you in the chipotle bathroom" and I can't get over how awesome that would've been
Is it a bad thing for a seven year old to call one an alcoholic? Asking for a friend..
Just got hit on via LinkedIn..do I capitalize on this opportunity/land a job or reply something sassy
I don't want to date him...I just want him to cheat on his girlfriend with me.
Juice tastes so weird without alcohol
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