i said send nudes i get bra and panties. thats not what i fucking asked for.
i have a new found respect for you. the amount of people you must have cockblocked last night is amazing
My face is bruised from laying on the concrete. NO MORE VODKA!
I am dressing up to go buy weed. I need to get out more.
Hey did where's my bong?
In the tree out back .... Top branch on the right
Should I bother to ask?
I gave you head at the stadium on a Thursday night ESPN game. That damn well better be worth points on the score board!!!
So ive narrowed my options down to getting food or masturbating. Don't judge me
The other day I was really high and I felt like my words were coming out of my mouth in flowers...I don't know.
earned some solid air miles from the plan B I just bought. #silverlinings
Listen, I've got balls in my face can I call you back
someone just "made it rain" kraft processed sliced cheese. i forgot what it was like to be home...
I can't remember what I did last night, but judging from the state of my hair I had a pretty good time.
I was fingering her and they busted into my room demanding to know who the best running back was, before I could say anything she moaned and said "Barry Sanders"
her nickname was handjob. I knew what i was getting into.
She grabbed the other one and started playing tug-o-war against the blonde chick. I told you getting my nipples pierced was a good idea
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