It was just so hard to get through Conan without crying like a baby. I'm just so proud of him.
Do you ever creep on the girls you have banged and wondered how their walk of shame went?
I need to stop taking drags of other peoples cigarettes, it's such a tease. Like playing just the tip, you just can't
yeah I'm sure your grandparents are the best but it's halloween. get a slutty costume and let's go ham.
I cant believe im wasting my plan b experience on this guy. I should have saved it for someone special.
I have nothing to lose. And a bunch of dick to gain.
Sometimes you have a life bucket list item checked off like 4 tits in your face simultaneously and getting to bang them both. I'm sorry I bailed on skiing but not really. Coming over with a boombox playing 'heat of the moment' as soon as I can hail a cab cause I'm too drunk to drive still...
You did a body shot out of her belly button with a bendy straw.
I was just asked by a police officer to not come back to Lancaster...
Btw, I feel the need to make sure we have no misunderstanding about this. So here goes. I'll happily mess around with you again. However, I probably won't do it while you're dressed like a creepy clown. Or any clown.
I'd just like to inform you. That when I was at bvj the first day I was blackout drunk by noon. Get on past Chelsea's level like now. Do it for present Chelsea
I got her number but I don't think I'll be able to smash, I was pretending to be British AND I forgot her name
He got me off while watching hockey. He's a keeper.
I force fed him french fries and then proceeded to tell him how sexy corgi’s are … it’s safe to say he’s not texting me for a second date.
Did you see her happy birthday to emily on facebook? The gist of it is like: hey emily you almost died at birth im glad you didn't. love mom.
Randomize
