he wasnt completely random
you're right. you met him once and didnt know his name. you still dont
i get things done.
You should have seen k-money last night. She was just hanging on to the toilet for half the night. By her fourth trip to puke, she started talking to it and was doing the voices for her and it. She kept saying "...we thank you for your continued business..." haha
i told my doctor i had 3 partners and one unprotected.. shes a cute little indian lady i couldnt break her heart
If no ones going to say it, then I will. Vanessa Hudgens boobs are weird looking
can you imagine how much money lesbians save on birth control?!?
bitches.
well seeing as i got a call at 5 am from the hotel manager telling me my cousin was passed out on the lobby floor...not good
dont be like that, i wasnt picking him over you. I was picking multiple orgasms over zoolander.
the only thing keeping me going right now is the knowledge that in 2 hours i'll be drunk at the circus.
Even though ive seen her get fisted by another girl at a party, shes still a doctor.
I have bruises on the inside of my thighs from sliding down the stair case...thanks for encouraging that slut show
his version of basketball was throwing hot sauce packets down my cleavage at taco bell at 2 am with his buddy.the cashier kept score
Is it weird that I only look up my ex on Twitter when I take a shit? May have conditioned myself to associate him with shit
Im playing a game I have to take a drink every time my gram asks me the same question hammered by 4 guaranteed
She totals her lexus and all she wants is to have crazy wild sex.
They told him he could only pay in monopoly money and he pulls out a wad of it from his pocket... i think im in love
Randomize
