You're completely useless in the revolution.
jersey shore has given me a vivid depiction of what things will be like for me once i get to hell
Whats a good hint for stop bitching im gonna give you head
I'm already mentally preparing myself for the fact that I'll probably be sleeping next to a toilet.
At least I know she didn't hear me crawl to my room. Or did I walk on my hands? Fuck if I know.
I'm here to help build your repertoire of drunken shenanigans and I should have been arrested stories
I don't remember much but I think I'm wearing your underwear, and for that, I am extremely grateful.
Let's just say I've never been so continually aware of my nipples before.
Woke up in a pile of people on the floor. His dad was already up and ask me to help him cook bacon because "7 lbs can be a mother fucker"
I either need to get adopted or have someone's baby, but I'm joining that family
the mexican frat downstairs started singing this mariachi song, then out of nowhere some dude busts out a trumpet and plays along. is this even real?
Dont judge the spank bank, just be happy that you were deposited there.
NO MAKING MOLDS OF ANYONES GENITALS
Fine. Suck all the fun out of life.
I'm getting a car wash man. I am go get a car wash high.
pls come over. need ride to hospital once taquitos are ready
We were fucking in the back of my truck and no joke a skunk came up and sprayed us. How am I supposed to explain this to my parents
Randomize
