are you so shy because you have an std?
oral is when you put your mouth on someones privates and play moterboat or popsicle
it always starts out as a suggestion then three hours later I have cum in my eye.
how many days can you live off of Vicodin and frosty?? im going on 4 days......
yeah, I said "hi, I'm the creepy old guy at the college bar" and she said that she like mature men, wasn't expecting that line to work
I wanna die of smoke inhalation. In a huge teepee. Or one of those big things kids in kindergarten have that you throw up in the air then sit inside of.
I have reached the state of intoxication where it is now a requirement to sit while peeing.
The cops walked in and cracked up bec he was passed out on the couch in a pink tutu.
In the middle of blowing him I looked at him and said "Your so old..." and then continued. I need to stop drinking.
We played Rock Paper Scissors to see who would have to go down on the other person.
Might be using my graduation money to pay for an abortion.
Is Oprah even human
It's not even noon and I've had 3 people call me a savage, one of them said it in reference to the blow job I gave them. So I guess you could say it's going to be a good weekend
Now after not puking, next step is not to do the accent when immigration says "hello."
Remember, I smoked so you wouldn't have to. I'm like the Jesus of Marijuana.
Randomize
