I thought she had more class and brains than to date a complete numb-nut, drug addict, fuck up like him. People never cease to amaze me
what's Bukake?
a bad idea.
let me put this in terms we both understand. he was the crunchwrap supreme of men--the perfect combo of all things manly, gooey and delicious. and ready for instant enjoyment.
yeah, she started doing yoga and cocaine....looks good on her.
he couldnt get it up, so i stole his lighter. i needed to have some reason to say the night wasnt wasted
That big chick who gave you the handly polished off one of the walls to the ginger bread house right before she came outside. FYI
It was the best present I've gotten since I was 5 and I got a fucking easy bake oven. I'm not pregnant for realsies. Celebratory party at the house tonight. Invite all the nice dicks you know.
Just talked to Laura, confirming that is my bra. Hope it goes well with the rest of your wall decorations.
That's what you get for dating construction workers you meet in tunnels.
He also turned out to be underage (the fucking liar) so we had to get drunk on cooking sherry
just so you know.. snorkeling hungover: great decision. I was throwing up and he couldn't even tell!
well i can officially check "have sex in a prius" off my bucket list...
If I get the job, I'm gonna get wasted to celebrate. If I don't get the job, I'm gonna get wasted to forget. Win-Win
U were so upset when the shower ruined ur nachos. I didn't kno what to do.
I've never sung with balls in my mouth
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