I kissed a girl and did not like it. Now I hate Katy Perry even more.
Have you ever noticed every guy named Shaant has scene hair and date girls with racoons stripes in theirs
His name should be shouldn't
So how gross is it that Woopie Goldberg has a vagina? She's like the exact opposite of a boner....
bitch asked me if i cared if she kept her snuggie on while we had sex
I need to shower. I still have paint on me from the homeless guys
I swear if it wasn't for meeting for drug dealers @ gas stations, i would never remember to get gas.
She's the perfect storm when it comes to psycho stalkers
we just finished a porn and sex toy shopping spree. this is the fun part of "being serious"
Because her vagina is one of those illusive black holes that leads to a parallel universe where he is king and the sea is made of beer! That is why they are together!
All I have done at work today is eat and try to get my coworker to tie me to his bed again
Random Survey Question: If things start getting serious with this cop, do I have to stop doing coke?
I saw a classic trojan enz laying on his desk. So he's probably not into the kinky shit.
this party is nice, but i have to go home and cry over anime in order to fill my daily quota of suffering
I'm a lady. Ladies do NOT hump the floor.
I just fucked her boyfriend. Happy birthday, bitch.
Randomize
