I was hooking up with him in my car, he wouldn't stop with my nipples, I had to literally beat him off of me. He kept groaning too while he was doing it. Sick.
Mommy issues
I just got back to Nicks and I shoul dnot have drank this much when I have to work at 7AM!!!!!
I called the bartender Mr. Intoxication last night. He thought it was funny until i threw up and blamed it on him
just went to get groceries. a cashier said she saw me last night. i guess i carried a broom back from the party and swept the street the whole walk back...and i claimed to be in the cast of wicked
My astrological sign? Vagitarius.
You were sitting at the bus stop holding hands with some Polish girl you just met, who was just as drunk as you were, and you kept trying to light your Kit Kat and smoke it.
just served this dwarf dude an entire pitcher of malt liquor. watching this will totally be worth my bartender's certification.
We ate our feelings. Then drank our feelings. I feel feminism delivered.
Braid them armpits, sister.
The novelty of Nekkid Straight Roommate has faded.
Yes. That was the exact moment of my conscience clicking into instant high alert.
is buying liquor on my lunch break too aggressive?
It's hard not to feel like a terrible person with bruises on your tits.
So... Sex in my rain boots last night. Trashy or a great show of character?
If it was with a guy, trashy. Sex with a girl is never trashy.
Became friends with a girl at work today until I realized we have the same taste in men. And I thought only I liked red-bearded fat men
No I'm not lying to you. I'm just not telling you the whole story. There's a massive difference.
Randomize
