11:03 p.m. Whats a lie i you lovn me. Let's cuddle.
Holy cold harsh reality of sobriety batman
just shaved my legs at the gas station bathroom before going to the club. is that too ghetto?
you rubbed the head of my dick and said "I shall call you Squishy and you shall be mine and you shall be my Squishy."
He was able to grab love handles during doggy style... I know we said spring break mexico diet starts next week but i think we need to start tomorrow.
Housekeeping just called to see if we were okay bc they came in the room earlier and we didn't move.
frozen drink friday is suspended until further notice
You don't care if I shave my legs, but you insist I be conscious for sex. Whatever. I really think your priorities are out of whack.
That basically sounds like the worst party of my life, and I'm including my brother's World of Warcraft themed birthday party.
I just used a VHS tape as a plate for sanwich
We kind of broke a table making out. So yes, I'd say it was successful.
He was chasing Ciroc shots with sips of Captain Morgan... he didn't make it to midnight
i turned around and there he was, right in my face. i was mid deep throat of a hot dog that i was eating with my hands and no bun. you win FSU, you win.
And change of plans today, I'm gonna lay in bed and eat taco bell and try not to die. Brazilians another day.
My first hangover at work. I'm officially an adult.
Randomize
