I want the hot one, scratch that. anyone.
I love being friends with rich people. I get laid by association.
I knew I shouldn't have slept with her...my dick looks like a stegosaurus tail
I should hang a sign above my bed that says "get hard or go home."
It's a good deal. He teaches me how to longboard, then we have sex
No that means he must've used the nipple clamps
They wouldn't let me hang out the sun roof and sing apple bottom jeans in the drive thru of hardee's i think i no longer like these ppl
Na Im fine, just need to un-grow this vagina I've developed
Whatever she smells like compost and feathers.
I believe they call that patchouli.
just because the DWI class is located at the University does not make him a professor. I was duped, he is in no way, shape or form a professor!
You think he will forgive me for the paper being a week late if I bring him a beer?
...it's a 9am class...
Ended up in some house where this dude has a $1200 leopard cat
she came into my car to rip lines with our blow dealer as I was writing my essay on anti drug policy, i call it on site research
My bail money is reserved for people I either A, think were in the right, or B, have an awesome story that leads up to needing it. Just remember that before you call me.
Two of the boys I banged while living in that house are about to move into it hahhaaha
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