Let's get naked and see who's stronger.
Last night was an abortion. I might need a publicist.
Jon and Kate. Drink everytime we see tears. Drink twice if a child cries. Finish your bev if you cry.
Saw an eatery called Rusty Taco. That sooo could be me.
both the worst and best vomit ever... it was extra chunky and thick cause of the sausage... but it also tasted like delicious sausage... also cause of the sausage
double majoring has taught me only that psych majors are sluttier than govt majors
Just woke up to find myself in a random bed with two people next to me having sex. I thought it would be awkward to just suddenly get up so i think I'm gonna lie here and pretend I'm still sleeping.
I'm pretty sure I have enough material at this point to start a blog called Guys I've Banged in Pictures together. Why does this keep happening to me!
Both of us came out of our rooms at the same time in boxers and sat on the couch. No words were spoken.
I'm gonna play eenie meenie at the bar tonight because it's women's day and I deserve the dick
I just moonwalked my socks off. THAT LAZY. THAT HIGH.
lol I'll trade you jello for a tampon
what a trade!
HE LEFT ME THE DAY AFTER I LET HIM PEE ON ME. If you date him after that, I'll leave the fucking PLANET.
What can i say, my face is nice and my body is just unreal. And my beer pouring/stealing is incredible \n
Sometimes I wish I could tell all my past/present hookups what the nicknames that my friends and I have assigned them.
Randomize
