There is a strange man mowing my lawn. Best day ever.
Jon and Kate are totally playing with my emotions.
i mean i care more about their marriage then my own parents
Shaq going to Cleveland; Vince Carter to the Magic; Michael Jackson, Farrah Fawcett, and Ed McMahon die.... ARMAGEDDON IS UPON US!!!!!
He kept saying it was because he was allergic to the chicken. Then he threw up on my mom.
I thought the one perk of the low caliber of men I've slept with thus far in my college career is that I would never run into them in the library. I've been here for ten minutes and we're on number three.
I wonder if you can snort coke upside down
We just did a shot to "getting laid in the bar bathroom". I love where this thursday is headed
he fell down during beer pong and the chick told him to rub the sand out of his pussy and suck it up. i am in love
My vagina is not really on board with my "emotional issues"
WHY DO I WANT TO FUCK EVERY GUY THAT BREATHES
Rick two cubicles down puked and that triggered three others puking into their trash cans as well. The janitorial staff hates it when we go drinking on a work night.
I just saw someone dressed as a bear leave your house on a motorcycle. I guess you guys are having a good time.
There is a time and place for BDSM, in-between disney sing-alongs is not one of them.
Just for once I'd like my first interaction with a new GP to not be an obvious sex injury.
I don't think "growing medical marijuana" is Quite what my Grandfather had in mind when he thought me about gardening as a child
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