Spring semester is just not the same w/o you
i've been fucking this guy since february and just found out he might be uncircumsized. currently google image searching to confirm.
I would give up sex for lent, but I think Jesus would understand that I went too long without it to go back now.
im trying not to drink and cry in the same night anymore. i'll let you know how it goes
Fun Fact: The stage were about to graduate on is where we once drove a van and kidnapped someone.
Fun Fact 2: My parents are sitting by the bushes I peed in this weekend.
We just passed a billboard that said to join "jerseydoesntstink.com" and literally 15 seconds later, we could smell jersey.
I mean, there was frosting being put on a tunafish sandwich. Pretty sure she knew we were high.
So I drew a giant robot attacking a city on the chem test. My TA colored in the fire on the burning building
Rule of thumb; if you ask me if my tits are fake you will not get to touch them.
If I drank a glass of water for every drink I had I'd die of water intoxication like some tweaked out looser at a rave
Bjs and tacos. That's my life.
One day soon I'll learn the difference between a good high and way too high. Today is not the day.
I want you more than I want a burrito.
I'm not as filling.
Calm down I'm not kidnapping the bartender
Just got my second shot
Baller. We’re going to be knee deep in strippers and coke in 10 days
Randomize
