walked into the kitchen nd asked my mom what smells like tuna she replies" your sister" now i cant eat tuna...EVER!!!
omg my older sister has been googling "how do I know if I've had an orgasm?" and "bj tips". the family laptop is not meant for this...
I bet they don't have a scenario slide on how to deal with a suggested three way with counsel during harassment training.
omfg. get on facebook. the science olympiad team had a rave.
She recited Pi throughout ever orgasm she had....she said it was a game she likes to play...how far she gets is how she judges her lovers...I am oddly turned on by this...
There should be a rule. If your dick is under 6 inches, you are not allowed to dress as Thor.
She's barefoot and topless screaming "HERE KITTY-KITTY" at a stray cat in the ditch on the side of the highway. How do I get her back in the car?
I'm going to make out with someone. I'm on a mission. I don't even care if I'm wearing beer goggles. As long as he's not shorter than me, gay, or a woman.
I am at Brians in a pirate costume, what the hell am I thinking
I DONT UNDERSTAND NIPPLES. THEY JUST POP OUT FOR NO REASON
Well somebody's had a rough day, nipple-wise
The pee I just pissed was about 7% better than the one at your house. But both are pretty far up there.
I just got the most majestic image of a potato sack full of dildos getting whipped at your head in slow motion.
I never thought in a million years that I would have a threesome with my boss and his wife and yet here we are.
I keep finding granola in my bed. This is what I get for sleeping with a guy from Oregon.
you know maybe it wouldnt be so bad if it hadnt happened before. At least I didnt blow him this time
Randomize
