Are you guys doing anything tonight?
Krysta
So we fuck and I say, "I'm about to go." He tells me, "No, leave at ten.. just lay here for a little while." When I ask, "Why?!" He gets his feelings hurt and says, "ugh. or don't." Since when did guys start acting like girls?
at least he left the skimmer on the side of the pool so i could fish out my thong in the morning
THE MIME IS MIMING TO BUST A MOVE KARAOKE. ALL MIME-RELATED EVENTS DESERVE CAPS LOCK
He's in the hospital yelling at his brother to at least have stuck something "normal" up his ass.
Again?
In other news there is a guy at my office who I'm pretty sure will be wearing someone's skin as a coat one day.
I don't want to flatter myself but after the way he was looking at me today I think it might be me.
We're so stoned that were both cuddling on the couch and crying over Forest Gump while eating popcorn. She asked me if I'd fuck away the sadness. I think she's serious.
Then, she put flavored warming oil on my dick and was amazed when something she bought FROM SPENCER'S almost burned my dick off.
He played with my boobs the whole time we watched Scott Pilgrim and then started invited others to play with them too. It reminded me of how my mom gives out my french fries without asking.
I just got the most majestic image of a potato sack full of dildos getting whipped at your head in slow motion.
I just used my citation as a bookmark. Want a beer?
Got really high to see my fist college experience unfold. Too high to find my classroom but I found the McDonald's down the street
Act your age.
I am. I'm acting like a drunk 20 year old.
got laid for being an eagle scout again. 4 more and ill have all my merit badges.
My penis definitely considers my Captain Cock costume a success
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