The way white people respond to them, you'd think Journey was the president of Caucasia.
Guess what? I had way too much to drink today. I'm properly wasted. Doing chores and playing video games while drunk. It's the nexus of stupidity and responsibility.
you always know who the new freshman are on fb because theyre always wearing prom dresses
never have phone sex with a hardcore republican during this health care crisis . just dont.
But guess what. I'm gonna roll over and go to sleep cuz there's no cuddling in phone sex.
Well, we missed our public lewdness court date. Looks like were going to jail in Alabama ...
Life lesson: When you compete in an impromptu "bloody mary chug-off," in the end, no one wins.
what is the protocol for being hungover enough to vomit in a potted plant during my botany lecture?
No just sleep deprived. James woke me up at 7 and forced me to eat a hot pocket with him cause he " didn't want me to die".
Told some chick I'm a virgin, on my way to her house as I type this. Debating crying afterwards to fuck with her head.
Literally just napped at strip club. Don't know how long
i mean hes a break dancing puerto rican, how do you think the sex was?
NO BABIES. YOUR VAGINA WILL BLEED WITHIN A FORTNIGHT.
Although the guy I'm messing around with just offered to let me be his rich brother's sugar baby
I was so drunk I got motion sickness from sex.
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