Hey I don't know if you will get this but all I know is you are so beautiful to .ee and? I dare anyone to stop me me from caring for you ante so beautiful so I kid you not gorgeous iyoiu are so beautiful to me i dare som.eone too stioo you
my computer doesn't work...
why?
i puked on it last night
New drinking game: drink every time the guy whose room we are in is creepy
enjoy the hospital
For future reference, a lint roller appears to be the easiest way to get glitter out of a beard.
Heyyyy darlin are you busy?
Why hello drunk Jake. It's sober Sarah, I'll tell drunk Sarah you booty called. She'll probably be around tomorrow night.
I didn't know there was such thing as a bad orgasm. Until him.
i always knew that i'd have sex in your room, i just assumed it would be with you
i have learned 4:30 is too early to start pregamming for the midnight harry potter
I have a fannypack full of condoms and acid. Let's get weird.
So stoned i forgot i was in bed
You get home okay?
I'm pantless and in bed
That doesn't mean you're at home.
When God was sprinkling self control to everybody, he ran out and was like ehhhh she'll make it!
I dont know how I should feel about you making a 37 year old come visit you and then making him do the walk of shame from your dorm room...through campus
Me and my liver are not on speaking terms.
I just need a big sign that says no more penis please hanging over my head at all times
Randomize
