As it would turn out, "jesusssssss" is not the password to enter Faith Chapel's wifi network.
i would eat my own dick if it were covered in nutella
Calling yourself a modern day Geisha doesn't justify being a whore.
It happened again. Now theres even more baby powder and its all over the place, I'm not cleaning that house.
She just landed. Popped over for a BJ and left. I'm a fan of layover layovers.
Um...celebrating is an understatement. You flashed the guy at the mexican restaurant and then screamed, "It's just my bikini, I swear!"
I think you were giving a sex seminar on your kitchen table last night.
We are finally out of the honeymoon stage of the relationship because it turns out that you can't come back from peeing on me in your sleep.
We have a little not a lot. We already rolled a blunt and named him Ron.
High-fiving last weekend's hook up in passing on the way to class has given me quite the lady boner.
but seriously, an anthropology paper shouldn't be hard if you're trashed, right?
He showed me his sex playlist and it looked good, so I slept with him.
I'll give you some leg action but I'm not showing you anything else until your penis admits it loves me
Pretty sure this radio station is run by a cult. Good thing it's in Spanish, can't brainwash someone who can't understand you.
She was a cheerleader in college and President of her sorority and now she’s a sales rep for a pharmaceutical corporation. “High maintenance hot” doesn’t even begin to explain it
But dear lord is it worth it
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